A hopeless romantic believes in fairytales and true love. Hopeless romantics are the imaginative, the idealists, and the sentimental dreamers. They often live with rose-colored glasses on. They make love look like at art form. They are in love with love.
- Urban Dictionary (revised)
I would like to start off by saying that in our society
today, I am doomed. Not only am I innocent
and naïve - lacking experience and knowledge about the truth of the world - I
am also plagued by social anxiety, idealism, and to top it all off, I’m a raving
hopeless romantic.
I fall hard and fast for any guy that I find fits into the
shoes of any romantic comedy male lead ever.
As we slowly work towards becoming friends, I begin to daydream multiple
scenarios, both good and bad, about the two of us as a couple, always following
the guidelines laid out in most romance novels.
And, finally, just as I’m ready to throw away my shell and spill all of
my feelings to said crush …
The screen of naïveté falls away and I find myself standing
in the barren, desolate wasteland that is reality. I realize that I thought this guy was
romantic because this act is how he gets laid.
I find out that he pursues nothing in a girl past her physical
aspects. I understand that “relationships”
in this society are by my definition a dying practice.
I back away.
As this cycle repeats itself over and over again, I lose
more and more hope that I will actually have my first boyfriend before the age
of twenty-five. Hence the term “Hopeless Romantic.”
I think too many people in the world settle for meaningless
relationships in order to fill their subconscious desire for love. In this society, we are so afraid to put
ourselves out there because of negative labels such as “nerd, geek, weird, strange,
annoying, clingy” etc. So we connect
over instant messaging. We bond over
pictures that disappear in seven seconds.
Instead of a date, we say, “wanna hang out?” which is really just code
for, “wanna hook up?” We remain in
label-free “relationships” that end the moment we know each other well enough
to let love sneak in.
Often, my problems with modern dating are labeled as a fear
of intimacy, all to do with my religion, exaggerated expectations, and even asexuality. I like to call it existing in life as it is
and seeing it for what it could be.
All I ask for in a relationship is love. And
that doesn’t necessarily mean opening doors for me or buying me presents on my
birthday. It means that I can knock on
your door after a long hard day and you won’t be too busy to give me a
hug. It means that I can spend hours with
you just talking and laughing. It means
that small things in your everyday life remind you of me. It means that I can tell people you're my boyfriend. And it means that I am also all of these
things for you.
I guess I live in the wrong time.
The hardest part is never knowing when that person will show up. Let the waiting commence!
